A few weeks ago, one of my nutrition and 1:1 clients, who works at the local high school, asked if Abby and I would come in and speak to a class of 7th and 8th graders about careers.
She also asked us to lead them through a workout.
We said yes.
But this wasn’t just about talking about careers. And it wasn’t just about movement.
This was about opportunities to create by who we are being.
Earlier that morning, I asked a few close friends:
“If someone were speaking to your 13-year-old self, what would have made a difference?”
They each gave me gold. Deep, heartfelt wisdom that I also carried with me into that room.
The Start:
As the kids filtered in, I didn’t stand off to the side waiting.
I looked each of them in the eye. Fist bumped them as I asked their name and told them mine with a big smile.
Abby did the same.
We wanted every single kid to feel seen from the start. That was intentional.
After a quick intro, we began with a warm-up.
Right away some kids were listening and engaging with respect.
While some were acting immature, a little rude, distracted and joking around.
I saw it happening and chose not to ignore it.
I paused and said this:
“Some of you are being great right now…respectful, listening.
And some of you are being rude. Disrespectful. Not taking this seriously.
I’m not mad I’m just letting you know we see you.
Who do you want to be? Respectful? Or Rude?
You can shift.
The choice is yours.”
And just like that, the energy shifted.
How We Coached Them
We taught them how to move.
We taught them the air squat and then a proper push-up.
The entire time, aware of our speaking speed, tone, presence, the words we used…all of it.
We communicated and coached from intention.
And when we gave feedback, I noticed another shift in some kids.
Another opportunity I thought.
I paused the room again and said:
“I want you to know something…
When Abby or I give you feedback, it’s not because we’re judging you.
It’s not “oh I suck at this.” “Why are they calling on me?”
We give you feedback on your movement because we care.
We want to keep you safe.
It’s kind to be honest with you.
It’s kind to help you.
To support you.
Can you feel that?”
You could feel the emotional tone of the room shift again.
They leaned in.
From there, they moved better. They listened more. They felt the care behind our coaching and listened better.
They performed a partner workout we had crafted.
In a hot gymnasium that felt like 100 degrees.
Effort was high. Teamwork was great. Movement quality was impressive for just learning how to do these correctly moments ago.
We coach them during the workout – acknowledged them after.
Not their result.
Their effort.
Their teamwork.
Had them fist bump their teammate who supported them, the people next to them who also worked hard.
Every moment we met them with loving, kind leadership.
Afterwards we stretched, and then… we all sat down and talked.
The Real Talk
I remember being 12-13 years old.
And shared a story from when I was their age.
I told them I knew what it felt like to not know who you are.
To not feel confident.
To want to be accepted.
To not like yourself sometimes.
To sometimes feel invisible or hold yourself back.
And that’s what led me to taking care of myself via eating better and exercising regularly.
And then I told them:
“You already have the ability to create the life you want.
Not by doing what everyone else tells you…
But by listening to that quiet voice inside, the one that knows what you love, what lights you up.
Follow that. It’s never wrong.”
Who I Chose to Be
Before Abby and I walked into that school, I decided who I was going to be.
Not another adult telling them what to do.
But someone who saw them.
Who reminded them of who they already are.
Who met them where they are at and equally had the courage to call them to be their best selves.
And in the entire process was someone who showed them what kindness with strength looks like.
I chose to be:
- Loving
- Grounded
- A mirror
- An example
Every word I spoke.
Every look.
Every moment of feedback…
I poured into those kids with purpose.
Because impact isn’t about control.
It’s about lighting a way, so others can see a way for themselves more clearly.
Acknowledgements
To Abby—thank you for your presence, your leadership, and the care you poured into those kids. You showed young boys and especially young women what strength, confidence, and compassion look like.
To Jen—thank you for inviting us into your space. After spending just a short time in your environment, I have an even deeper respect for the work you do and the role you play every day.
To my friends who shared their insights with me this morning—you helped shape this.
Thank you for your depth and your hearts.